I’m Actually Going To South Africa – Dhillondeeds

Somebody pinch me. I am actually travelling to South Africa. This is so weird. Strange actually, I feel like this is my first time inside an airport. I knew this day would come I just wish I was going for a completely different reason. Duty calls. But another call keeps replaying in my head… My heart is racing. I am so nervous…

I’ve entered Heathrow airport at terminal 5 but had to leave my husband and daughter at the entrance. Of cause. We’re still trying to operate through a global pandemic. I guess, we’ve been living away from any airports for so long. My goodness, the border it’s a different world. Everyone is wearing a mask. Yes, everyone. I have yet to see someone who isn’t. I’ve not experience strict restrictions during this covid reign. It’s also been a kinda of “unless you are exempted” and most people just suddenly had medical issues that were exemplary. Gosh, and it’s busier than I imagined. I thought I was going to walk into a ghost town but I feel good that people need to be places, travelling… because that means, maybe just maybe our aviator lives are on track to going back to reality. I really want normality back. Even if it’s only for the staff travel perks, my goodness! The cost of full fare tickets are expensive! It was excruciatingly painful to see that figure at the end of the ticket a few nights back. But duty calls. And family, family matter. I’ve always been the big sister who takes control, moves mountains, protects… So, it was obvious… I had to make this trip… I am just so proud of how well my younger sibling counterparts have taken this situation by the scruff of the neck and got the ball rolling…

Oh, there’s one. A lady who isn’t wearing a mask. I love her bag. It’s a lovely lilac colour. She’s paired it with a red dress and tan coloured clogs. A very odd ensemble even I wouldn’t do that, or would I? Red and purple? Essentially lilac is purple right… She’s on her way. Long gone and none the wiser that some South African who got stuck in London all those months ago was analysing her outfit as if it was the met gala. Oh the airport fashion. I love the airport fashion. I guess I always did because I didn’t get much freedom traveling as staff having a dress code to adhere too. I also looked boring. Today I am wearing takkies, trainers for those who aren’t South African. I paid for the privilege and a comfy pinky salmony colour tracksuit that says “be yourself” and a really ugly cargidan that I couldn’t return because I lost the receipt. I love slogan tees, and bags and mugs, slogan anything really. Still, I didn’t make any effort. I was going for comfy. And comfy is what I feel but can’t help but wonder what others are thinking.

People are happy. Like really happy. Travel makes you feel that way. What an amazing rush of all sorts of great adjective to describe excitement. A little girl drinking a fruitshoot, some siblings being siblings, a couple of a laptop, a lady going through her Louis Vuitton handbag, a mum keeping her child in check, people trying to have conversations with a mask on, hardly anyone on their phones… I’ve been standing in this check in for for 25 mins now with no end in sight. I meant it when I said it is busy.

I have not slept or ate in days. I am such a nervous flyer even pre-covid. I’m not sure you could call it a fear of flying but it does give me an unreasonable amount of anxiety especially on those days building up to the day of the flight. This time around my anxiety is pretty much only around catching this blady virus and the complications it will cause, again…. So say a little prayer for me, please, that I make through this unscathed by this little monster. That reminds me, I need to put my face shield on or is that too much?


Now my thoughts are on my daughter. This is the first time we are away from each other for this long. But I know she’s strong and resilient and she knows why mama has to go away for a little while. It’s only 3 weeks. 19 sleeps. Eish. That is a long time. Why did I think it was shorter… She’s such a breathe of fresh air that girl. And I am gonna miss her with every single piece of me.

Finally check in, after someone had to call out to me a few times because I actually slipped away into a day dream of some sorts that I can’t even remember now and then I had a little laugh with the check-in lady. She was so lovely. I joked about her having to remind me how to do this. I joked, but actually I was serious like in a serious way. She was so nice about it. I gave her passport, fit to fly certificate and then the moment came to weigh my luggage… Phew… Not overweight… Bye bye bag… See you in ZAR… And now for security…

Yay out on the other side in one piece, unscathed. What a delightful security check at Heathrow I have ever experienced. I almost always get pulled a side for something or other like the time my mother kept a tiny out of jam in her bag that required all of the SWAT team on the case. Imagine their dismay when they extracted a Jamie Oliver pot of jam. The relieve on my face could be seen light years away. Because you never know with my mother. Jokes. Okay, duty free… toilet and a quick face mask change…

Itsu, yum now I’m hungry. Chanel. What even is that display. Dior. Love that Christian Dior bag. Prada. Mmm I like these a lot better especially the lilac one on the left. Oh jeez, lilac, maybe I would actually pair a lilac bag with a red dress. Hermes has a cute astronaut display in the window. And Tiffany and co, do I go in and have a peak or not? the answer is no. Cartier. Quick walk faster. I am a sucker for Cartier. Gucci. Ugh whatever. I have a bad shopping relationship with them. I wasn’t gonna look but omgee say yes to the the bag in the front window display. I’ve just realized I walked past my turn. I need to find terminal B not window shop. Focus…

Right. There we go. I found it. The ghost town I was expecting. Only a handful of people in sight. But it feels good to sit down and take my mask off for a little breather. I don’t need to be here just yet but this is what we do. Go to the gate, get familiar with the route and then set off to raid duty free. Just like I remember it. Only this time I’m not going to raid duty free because I have a strict budget and I did most of my treat shopping this morning.

I pictured this first trip back so different. Like the kind of different where covid and all its legalities just didn’t exist, the only nervousness I felt was getting through security from one side and crossing the border safely on the other, get excited about the idea of seeing a new place and exploring, having my daughter and husband with me, where I didn’t have to make a trip because of a tragic accident… However scary and exhausting the reality is, it’s safe to say that I am looking forward to just getting there and back in one piece. Safe, happy and healthy.

All that aside, I am looking forward to seeing everyone again. After almost 20 months of not being able to see my family and friends. I just wish the circumstances were different…

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